The truth about EXTRA

I hope this blog finds you well. I am well, but not well off. I, in fact, struggle from paycheck to paycheck like the rest of you. There are those few that see me as “banking”. Perhaps good common sense just evades them, or they are completely disillusioned, I am not sure which, but my definition or rich is wayyyyy different than the people that perceive me as rich. Rich is having nice things and not having to work (in the monetary sense). If you we insinuating I am rich because of my awesome relationship, family, and the ability to want to spend every moment I have with them, then yes, I am rich (the way you should be rich). I know when people say I am rich it’s because they look around and see all the nice things I have. What you don’t see is the struggle, and what it takes as far as work and sacrifice to acquire it all. If you did, then you would have nice things too.

I am literally sick to death of people that see me finance a new vehicle, and try to sell my old one outright, assume they are entitled to have it, because “She has so much money she has EXTRA! She can afford to give me that extra…” The stuff of mine that you consider Extra in fact, was an expense to me, so why should I gift it to you? Lazy people if you spent as much time working as you do evading work then you would have a car too. There is no such thing as extra! The only extra I get is extra hours to pay for this shit. Why shouldn’t I sell a ten-year old vehicle outright and pay off some bills (Yes I have those) and use the rest to take my family on a little vacation? I respect anyone that tries and by nature I am a giving person, and I often give anonymously to causes I believe in and support. I don’t believe in supporting lazy folks, that is a cause I will not support.

I have literally gotten in touch with old friends and even family (yeah I said family) after years of not seeing them. The conversations go like this, “Wow you are doing good for yourself, and you think you can give me your extra….” That is a hell of an icebreaker by the way. Why haven’t I seen you? I have been working my tail off and pinching dimes to eat! Why should I give you something you are capable of getting off your butt and earning just like me? In fact, how were you surviving before I came along?

I literally have had people express that I have it made, and that I am just rolling in the dough, etc. What a ridiculous notion. If we are going to be exact I am actually rolling in monthly payments! I know I know lucky me, but hey, since you were wanting my extra I have tons of bills I can split with you.

The truth is people like me trying to pick up the “extra” shifts, or jobs so we can pay our bills, often wish they could just stay at home with their family, so they aren’t missing so much. They wish they could have extra too, but the extra they want is time, not some object. I suggest when you sit at home trying to balance my check book while looking through your little glass menagerie you look a little closer and look at all the work that is put in to acquire it. I didn’t just wake up and have a car fall into my lap, a house, etc. What usually falls in my lap is a stack or bills, and my, “We will figure it out,” attitude. While you are peeking in through your window, to see what extra you can get out of me simply because you feel entitled, realize, my extras I give to you are not required, they are gifts. I hope you walk away fine with the material extra you seem to think I snap my fingers and accumulate, rather than the extra, time and sacrifice I spend away from my family to give it. I would wager if you spent less time accounting for my money, and my assets, and used your savvy financial skills to get a job, you would have all these things too!

On the occasion I say I cannot afford to give (which is hard because it is frustrating to know you work as much as I do and cannot contribute, but to make ends meet and sometimes yes, I scrape together the money so you go away) taking to social media with cryptic little messages that go something like, “Wow, you learn who your real friends or family is when you are down and out, you know who you are, this is why I am independent I don’t need anybody…” bullshit, yes I know you are talking to me. No I am not impressed by your e-balls, and yes I know I will hear from you when you need something in the future Ms./Mr. Independent.

 

The funny thing about extra and posts like that, make me realize I do have extra. Extra baggage. If you cannot come over to my home and have a meal with me and enjoy my company without incessantly needing everything you see in my home as an extra, then please Mr./Mrs. Independent take your behind to the nearest workforce place, gain employment, and do not ask me for another thing. Objects don’t rule my life, and neither does drama. Providing my family a safe place for my kids to be raised and a good school district costs a lot of extra sacrifice, but are well worth it, as I strive for their life to be better than mine, and mine is pretty awesome. Even with your ill conceived notions of my “extra” wealth.

Sincerely, There is no such thing as Extra, unless it's an Extra Shift at WORK.